No scars for me, I'm afraid. What I do have in abundance are bruises.
I have always bruised easily, I get it from my mother. It doesn't matter whether I have run into something, fallen down, or been hit by something, I bruise. Most of the time, I don't even know where my bruises come from! They simply show up and say, "hey Leah! Nice leg... except for me!" and laugh. Very comforting.
One bruise that I have right now, though, is of unmistakable origin. You see, I learned how to snowboard over the weekend. 'Learned' being the operative word, since I actually spent most of the time sitting on my butt, but we'll roll with it.
I was on the bunny hill with my good friend Heidi, who was teaching me at the time. We made our way down (I only fell twice!) and stood at the bottom of the hill, looking up towards our destination.
Now, shortly before this, I had mastered the chair lift. I could do that no problem, but what I wasn't expecting was a rope tow. Never having done this before, I was slightly intimidated by having to grab onto a fast moving rope to be pulled up a hill. Everyone has heard the rope tow horror stories: being dragged across the ground in humiliation being the most common. I didn't want that to happen to me!
When I asked the operator for a tip, she said to grab it very slowly. So I did. Only her definition of slowly was probably different than mine.
I wasn't dragged across the ground, no! That wouldn't be humiliating enough! Instead, and it pains me to admit this in a public forum, I was flipped over the rope head first into a sign. Only then was I dragged across the ground.
So that's the story of how Sir Fredericton came to life. Just now, from his place on my left knee, this purple and blue monster asked me if I could please wear a skirt tomorrow, because he wished to see the light of day before he faded into non-existence.
No, Sir Fredericton. I'm wearing long jeans until you go away.
I have always bruised easily, I get it from my mother. It doesn't matter whether I have run into something, fallen down, or been hit by something, I bruise. Most of the time, I don't even know where my bruises come from! They simply show up and say, "hey Leah! Nice leg... except for me!" and laugh. Very comforting.
One bruise that I have right now, though, is of unmistakable origin. You see, I learned how to snowboard over the weekend. 'Learned' being the operative word, since I actually spent most of the time sitting on my butt, but we'll roll with it.
I was on the bunny hill with my good friend Heidi, who was teaching me at the time. We made our way down (I only fell twice!) and stood at the bottom of the hill, looking up towards our destination.
Now, shortly before this, I had mastered the chair lift. I could do that no problem, but what I wasn't expecting was a rope tow. Never having done this before, I was slightly intimidated by having to grab onto a fast moving rope to be pulled up a hill. Everyone has heard the rope tow horror stories: being dragged across the ground in humiliation being the most common. I didn't want that to happen to me!
When I asked the operator for a tip, she said to grab it very slowly. So I did. Only her definition of slowly was probably different than mine.
I wasn't dragged across the ground, no! That wouldn't be humiliating enough! Instead, and it pains me to admit this in a public forum, I was flipped over the rope head first into a sign. Only then was I dragged across the ground.
So that's the story of how Sir Fredericton came to life. Just now, from his place on my left knee, this purple and blue monster asked me if I could please wear a skirt tomorrow, because he wished to see the light of day before he faded into non-existence.
No, Sir Fredericton. I'm wearing long jeans until you go away.
3 comments:
HAHAHAHAHA! Oh, Leah! That's so silly. And sad.
Also why I am never, ever going to attempt snowboarding.
this is why you are so amusing, my dear! i must giggle at this. not for the fact you hit as ign then got dragged up a hill, no, i think its for the fact you named a buised and wanted to spite it. hahahahahaha!
well, sir fredericton has been very offensive as of late, and to spite it is the only appropriate response I can come up with. seriously, he's still sticking around! he won't go away!
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